Chapter 5 | 57
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You better go and find Joan then,” I said in a matter-of-fact voice.“I've a date coming any minute and he won't like seeing me sittingaround with you.” “A date?” Buddy looked surprised. “Who is it?” “It’s two,” I said, “Peter the Hermit and Walter the Penniless.” Buddy didn’t say anything, so I said, “Those are their nicknames.” Then I added, “They're from Dartmouth.” I guess Buddy never read much history, because his mouthstiffened. He swung up from the wicker rocking-chair and gave it asharp little unnecessary push. Then he dropped a pale blue envelopewith a Yale crest into my lap. “Here's a letter I meant to leave for you if you weren't in. There’sa question in it you can answer by mail. I don’t feel like asking youabout it right now’ After Buddy had gone I opened the letter. It was a letter invitingme to the Yale Junior Prom. I was so surprised I let out a couple of yips and ran into the houseshouting, “I’m going I’m going I’m going” After the bright white sunon the porch it looked pitch-dark in there, and I couldn't make out athing. I found myself hugging the senior on watch. When she heardI was going to the Yale Junior Prom she treated me with amazementand respect. Oddly enough, things changed in the house after that. The seniorson my floor started speaking to me and every now and then oneof them would answer the phone quite spontaneously and nobodymade any more nasty loud remarks outside my door about peoplewasting their golden college days with their noses stuck in a book. Well all during the Junior Prom Buddy treated me like a friend ora cousin. We danced about a mile apart the whole time, until during “AuldLang Syne” he suddenly rested his chin on the top of my head as ifhe were very tired. Then in the cold, black, three o’clock wind wewalked very slowly the five miles back to the house where I wassleeping in the living-room on a couch that was too short because 58 | The Bell Jar it only cost fifty cents a night instead of two dollars like most of theother places with proper beds. I felt dull and flat and full of shattered visions. I had imagined Buddy would fall in love with me that week-endand that I wouldn't have to worry about what I was doing on anymore Saturday nights the rest of the year. Just as we approached thehouse where I was staying Buddy said, “Let’s go up to the chemistrylab?” I was aghast. “The chemistry lab?” “Yes.” Buddy reached for my hand. “There's a beautiful view upthere behind the chemistry lab.” And sure enough, there was a sort of hilly place behind thechemistry lab from which you could see the lights of a couple of thehouses in New Haven. I stood pretending to admire them while Buddy got a good footingon the rough soil. While he kissed me I kept my eyes open and triedto memorize the spacing of the house lights so I would never forgetthem.
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